Artichokes, black pens and tasty childs
by Please Moo With Me
Summary: Have I lost it? The wiggles Wicked Lemiz... soo many things... haha. I HAVE lost it. But by the time this is done you will realise Galinda has too.
1. In love

"Galinda ate me!!!!!!!!!!" Elphie heard a random little girl cry.

"I did not!!!" Galinda countered. She always had a way with words.

"Its _cold_!!" Galinda complained.

"But you can't be cold, the black pen is right there!!!!" Elphie said.

"I think that Galinda's stomach isn't very comfy." Said the muffled voice of the random little girl. "It has Llamas and old food and… and… is this a PEN??"

"I got hungry and, the pen looked tasty…" Galinda said, trying to defend herself.

Suddenly Galinda looked starving again and with an evil glint in her eye she called for Elphie to come closer. "Come here Artichoke!!!! I'm hungry and… vegetables are supposed to be really good for you."

"NOOOOOO!!!!! I screamed." Screamed Elphie.

Suddenly Galinda sat on the floor and, (by now she was almost in tears, and sung:

Sometimes I walk alone at night  
When everybody else is sleeping  
I think of him and then I'm happy  
With the company I'm keeping  
The city goes to bed  
And I can live inside my head

On my own  
Pretending he's beside me  
All alone  
I walk with him 'til morning  
Without him, I feel his arms around me  
And when I lose my way, I close my eyes and he has found me

In the rain  
The pavement shines like silver  
All the lights are misty in the river  
In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight  
And all I see is him and me forever and forever

And I know it's only in my mind  
That I'm talking to myself and not to him  
And although I know that he is blind  
Still I say there's a way for us

I love him  
But when the night is over  
He is gone  
The river's just a river  
Without him, the world around me changes  
The trees are bare and everywhere the streets are full of strangers

I love him  
But every day I'm learning  
All my life I've only been pretending  
Without me, his world will go on turning  
The world is full of happiness that I have never known

"Who are you in love with now???" Elphie asked. Slightly amused.

"Anthony."

"Anthony as in…"

"Anthony from the wiggles, yes." Galinda sniffled back.

"That explains the food stuff…"

"I thought that maybe… maybe… if I ate as much as him he would love me to."

"You do know that in Oz no one has ever heard of the wiggles right?" Sighed the little girl, clearly directing this at me, the author.

"Shut up, you're ruining my fun." Boomed the author's (AKA my.) disembodied voice.

"What, who was that?" Galinda said startled.

"No one, go back to your being in love!!!" I boomed.

"Uh kay!!!" The small blonde said.

Suddenly the door burst open and…

* * *

Haha. That was sooo much fun to write. If you like it tell me, if you dont like it tell me why...

Hugs.

Bestest


	2. Dakota Fanning!

Suddenly the door burst open and in came Angel Dumot Schunard, Dragging Anthony of the Wiggles by the ear, with Mark trailing behind, filming the whole thing.

"Now, I am setting you, Anthony, up with you, Galinda. Any questions? No? Good." Angel said reminding Mark of a military Drill person.

Mark, realising the heater was on, walked over to the fridge to hang up his coat and, regretfully, his scarfy.

"I'm sorry scarfy, I love you, I do. It just-" He stopped and listened. "No, don't say that! I do love you, its too hot to wear you in here and-" He listened again, this time close to tears. "Fine, I will keep you on, only if you promise NEVER to leave me EVER!" He listened. "Good. I love you to."

"Wait… was he just talking to his SCARF?" Elphie asked, laughing.

"He does that a lot honey." Angel relied

"Oh." Elphie said bursting into hysterical laughter.

Galinda, who saw nothing funny in this situation, let out a long wail.

Mark walked over to the fridge and opened it, what he saw made him gasp in horror.

Ron and Harry were making out wildly in the fridge. Harry broke away from Ron, his lipstick all over Harry's neck, looking embarrassed.

"Don't tell Ginny!" He begged. "I beg of you. Don't tell her! She'd hate me!"

"But I thought you love ME!" Ron shouted at Harry.

The rest of the conversation was muffled because Mark slammed the fridge shut, deciding to keep his jacket on.

"That was weird." Said the random little girls muffled voice.

"Damn straight." Said I, the author. "I am messed up!"

"We guessed." Said the muffled girls voice.

"Uh-oh." Said Galinda, who had now turned a shade of green that was green enough to rival Elphie's green-ness.

She then vomited up:

4 llamas.

1 black pen.

8 computers.

46 Fighter planes.

Voldemort. (Who quickly scampered off out of sight.)

12 un-opened boxes of Jatz biscuits.

Carrots.

And finally Dakota Fanning.

"EEEWWW!!!' The random little girl now known as Dakota Fanning screamed.

Galinda giggled and skipped over to stand next to her love, Anthony of the Wiggles.

Angel, Mark, Harry, Ron, and Elphie had all jumped on to the couch to avoid getting swallowed by the llamas.

Angel, now back in drill instructor person mode yelled:

"Alright! Now, Anthony, put your arm around Galinda."

"Who is Galinda?" Anthony replied.

"The small blonde next you, idiot!"

Anthony scanned the room, at his eye level and saw no blonde female.

"You don't mean… Mark do you? Because that would be gross… and make me gag." He said.

"Hey!" Shouted mark. He went ignored.

"No, look to your left… down… down… down… down… there." Angel said.

"Oh, ok."

He put his arm around Galinda and she promptly fainted.

"MARK!!! STOP MAKING OUT WITH YOUR SCARF!!!" Angel suddenly yelled, making every jump and turn to look at Mark.

"I… I… wasn't!!!" Mark protested.

"Yes you were." Every one said in unison in a sing song voice.

Suddenly, everyone had the same urge to sing a song and sing it they did!

Elphie:  
She'd say, kids, there's a place  
That's like no other  
You got to get there before you die

Ron:  
You don't get there  
By playing from the rule book

Galinda:  
You stack the ages

Anthony:  
You load the dice

Harry and Angel:  
Mother dear  
Oh, we know you're down there listening --  
How can we follow  
Your sweet  
Advice  
To

Ron:  
Easy street  
Easy street  
Where you sleep till noon

Authors disembodied voice:  
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Angel and Ron:  
She'd repeat  
Easy street  
Better get there soon.

Angel Mark and Dakota Fanning:  
Easy street  
Easy street  
Where the rich folks play  
Yeah, yeah, yeah  
Move them feet

Dakota Fanning:  
Move them ever-lovin' feet

Harry:  
To easy street

Ron:  
Easy street

Harry, Ron and Author:  
When you get there stay

Elphie:  
It ain't fair  
How we scrounge  
For three of four bucks  
While she gets  
Warbucks

Galinda:  
The little brat!  
It ain't fair this here life  
Is drivin' me nuts!  
While we get peanuts  
She's livin' fat!

Voldemort's voice from a random corner somewhere:  
Maybe she holds the key  
That little lady

The llamas:  
To gettin' more bucks

Galinda:  
Instead of less  
Maybe we fix the game  
With something shady

Elphie:  
Where does that put us?

Ron:  
Oh, tell her.

All:  
Yes!

"That was random." Said Galinda.

And she was right, it totally was.

* * *

Like it? Tell me. Dont like it? tell me.

Hugs for all reviewers.


	3. The Phantom? Tracey? Elsie the cow?

**_NO COPYRIGHT STUFF IS INTEENDED!! IF I TRIED TO NAME ALL THE THINGS I GOT FROM OTHERS I WOULD DIE!!!!!!!!! HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!! I AM SOO HYPED!!!!!!!! Review if you like it. _**

**_AND AGAIN!!! I DONT OWN IT!!! DONT OWN IT!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!!_**

Galinda had dragged Anthony of the Wiggles out into the garden and bought with them a picnic basket that contained:

Food and not much else.

"Do you know what I like?" Galinda broke the silence by asking, with a mouthful of the afore mentioned food, that sprayed all over Anthony.

"Talking with your mouth crammed full?" He asked wiping away crumbs from his arms, face and shirt.

"No, silly! Lollypops!" She said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Why do you like lollypops?" Anthony of the Wiggles asked, not really very interested.

"I just do." Galinda said "Don't you?"

"Not really."

"But- but- but-" Galinda said nearly crying. "I thought you loved all food!!"

"Well, no, I don't. I actually barely eat anything. In real life that is."

Galinda let out a wail that shattered glass and made Anthony's eyes water.

"YOU LIED TO ME!!!!!" She shrieked.

"No I, I…"

Suddenly a stunningly beautiful girl walked up. Her skin sparkling in the sun, her gold hair bouncing. She was prettier than Galinda by far and this shocked her so much she threw up again. All over said Beauty.

"Um…Ew." She said.

Galinda curled up and cuddled close to her camera and fell asleep.

"Umm… She just hurled on me! Is there anywhere I can… freshen up?" The beauty said.

"Nope." Anthony replied simply.

"Not even for a sexy, attractive thing like me?"

"No."

"Come oooo-ooon." She whined.

"No."

"Don't you find me sexy at all?"

"Nope. I'm gay. In love with Mark."

"Umm… Mark?" Rosalie asked, bewildered.

"Mark… you know… Cohen…?"

"Oh… umm… ew." She said, disgusted. "He's like, in Rent, right?"

"Yeah…" Anthony said blushing.

"I WANNA MEET HIM!!!!" Rosalie suddenly, screamed. "I. Love. Rent."

"Oh… kay… but… Mark. Is. MINE!" Said Anthony with a golem-ish look on his face.

"Fine."

So they walked off together arm in arm.

"Hey," Asked Anthony. "When did you tell me your name was Rosalie?"

"I… didn't."

"Oh."

Galinda woke up, alone and frightened and covered in crumbs and vomit.

"Where the fu- I mean… where ever in Oz am I?"

She looked around, candles were burning and there was an organ. A faint smell of old or even, dead rat hung in the air. She got up from the cold, damp, wet, cold, damp and ratty floor. Her joints creaked and sounded suspiciously like a fat kids snore.

"Wait! That WAS a fat kids snore!" Exclaimed Galinda in mock surprise, turning around so fast her, wet, cold, damp, ratty, cold, ratty, vomit covered hair, whipped her (like cream) in the face.

On a bed, lying, covered in fish sauce, was a fat, snoring, Brunette, girl.

"Who the fu- I mean… who in Oz's name are you?" Galinda shrieked, terrified of the fat, brunette, fish sauce covered girl.

"Tracey." She said. Apparently she was awake, not asleep, snoring. Tracey apparently, realising she was covered in fish oil, started licking it off.

"Mm… oily goodness!!!" Tracey stated with enthusiasm.

"Uuh… kay… who are you? Wait, don't tell me… your… tracey!"

"How," She licked her forearm "Did," She licked her thigh "You guess?" Lick.

"I'm… psycho!!" Galinda stated proudly.

"I guessed." Said Piper Halliwell. She went, like Mark in the previous chapter, ignored. She then proceeded to drown.

"Wow, a real psycho, I am so hon-" She was cut off by a loud slurping noise from behind a red curtain.

SLUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRPP.

"What the fu- I mean… what in Oz's name is behind that, emer- I mean, red, curtain?"

"Pay no attention to the man and woman sucking each others faces off behind the emer- I mean, red, curtain." The booming voice of the Phantom of The Opera said.

"Umm… What? Oh well… uh kay!" Galinda said bouncily. "I WANT MY MOMMIE!!" She suddenly wailed. Apparently prone to Bipolar-ness.

Tracey then started convulsing in dance-like motions.

"What the fu- I mean… What in Oz's name? Is Elphaba around?"

When Tracey finished her apparent seizures she said, "No! Who's that? Oh well… I have AIDS."

"What the fu- I mean… Oh, isn't that a S… T… D?" Galinda struggled to spell the word.

"No! Silly! It stands for: Apparently Infectious Dancing Syndrome. Duh."

"Oh…" Galinda said, ashamed that she didn't know what it was. "I knew that. I DID!"

"Sure…"

The green meadow they were now, apparently in, melted away before there eyes.

"Wait, when did we get to be in the green meadow?"

"I… have… no… Idea…" A very confuzzled and out of place Madame Giry answered.

Chorus:  
Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, let it be.  
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, let it be.  
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

Verse:2  
And when the broken hearted people  
Living in the world agree,  
There will be an answer, let it be.  
For though they may be parted there is  
Still a chance that they will see  
There will be an answer, let it be.

Chorus:  
Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, let it be.  
Yeah, there will be an answer, let it be.

Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, let it be.  
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

(instrumental break)

Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, yeah let it be.  
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

Verse:3  
And when the night is cloudy,  
There is still a light that shines on me.  
Shine on 'till tomorrow, let it be.  
I wake up to the sound of music  
Mother Mary comes to me  
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Chorus:1  
Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, let it be.  
There will be an answer, let it be.

Let it be, let it be.  
Let it be, let it be.  
There will be an answer, let it be.

Sung Galinda. Every one stared at her and she promptly vomited and then fainted. Right on top of Elsie the cow.

"What the fu- I mean what in Cyberland's name is she doing lying on me?" Asked Elsie.

"I have no Idea." I answered.

**_REVIEW IF YOU LIKE IT!!!! OR IF YOU DONT!!!! I LIKE ALLLLLL REVIEWS!!!! CEPT FLAMES. (Growls like Edward.)_**


End file.
